I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
