Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Acid is not a monday night drug
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
