My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize