My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
