Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
