we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
