I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
Are my feet made of real feet?
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
