People with herpes should wear stickers.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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