when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Randomize
