Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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