Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
