worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
Randomize