She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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