can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
