if you like me you must not know who I am
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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