I want to stick my p in your. b.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
