Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
