Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
