Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
