Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
