so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
