you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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