I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
It's just like the Real World with babies
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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