she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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