YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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