i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
