Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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