we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
