i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
Randomize
