i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
