i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
