trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
