why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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