Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
