Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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