We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
