We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Randomize
