You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
