Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
