I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
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