I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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