He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
