I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize