Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
