i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
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