Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
