It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Just invented taco cereal.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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