Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
