Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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