Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
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