Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
