Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
